HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!
I know most people either hate or love this holiday based on whether they’re single or attached. The attached ones only love it if their significant others remember to do something nice and the singles ones only truly hate it when they have to look at the flowers everyone else got. I personally don’t care either way, although I do enjoy that the holiday produces such bitter shit.
And extra hostile Facebook statuses like this one from a girl I went to college with: Please don’t upload pictures of your flowers and chocolate and gifts to facebook. I don’t care. Instead, grow some self esteem so that you don’t need the confidence boost you get by uploading pointless pictures to facebook. Happy valentines day everyone.
I am mostly stoked that I had an excuse to buy a shit ton of Sweetarts at CVS yesterday and no one will judge me when I eat the whole bag. Well, they may judge me, but then they’ll remember I’m single and excuse my bad behavior. Except my dentist– he’s going to be real pissed. See that note at the bottom? Give to friends! That’s probably not going to happen.
It’s probably good I don’t have a hot date tonight as I’ve developed a wicked cold that I’m currently choosing to ignore/remedy by drinking liquid Dayquil out of the bottle. We’re all pretty sick in the office it turns out. Bree and I had a standard– hi, you look like shit, you look like shit too– conversation this morning. Not to be mean, mind you, but to validate each others’ germs.
IF YOU NEED ME
I’ll be home tonight with my favorite boys, Roommate A and Roommate B. I’m positive they didn’t buy me flowers and chocolates but I can guarantee they’ll sit on the couch with me and my runny nose and ask me about my day and make fun of the way I pronounce “bag”. And that ladies and gentlemen– is love.