1. I can’t say this enough– fuck pollen. I wake up every morning and have to choose between taking my allergy crack (Claritin-D) and thus being able to breathe OR having my heart race and feeling slightly cracked out for the majority of the day.
2. I learned a vital lesson this morning and that is DO NOT under any circumstances take allergy crack and drink 2 cups of the extra strong work coffee. I’ve never typed so fast in my life!
3. Turns out I’ve completely forgotten how to dress myself for this beautiful weather we’ve been having. When I shucked the tights and showed up to the office bare-legged last week, I felt like a harlot. Bare legs– such the scandal! I also didn’t remember how time consuming it is to remember to keep your legs together.
4. If there is one thing I hate more than almost anything else in the world it is changing bed sheets. I used to pay my old roommate (back when I lived in a civilized environment with girls) $5 to make my bed every time I did laundry. That’s how much I hate it.
It took me until Thursday to finally take the polar fleece sheets off my bed. Because given the option at 10PM at night to either A) change my sheets or B) crank on the fan, I choose fan every time.
5. Again– pollen is the worst thing in the entire universe.
6. Following my very first day of being at the office wearing no tights, I also had my very first day of Bike Sharing home in a skirt wearing no tights. Let the flashing begin! It took me a couple blocks to remember the rules, but I quickly felt back in my element.
7. One of the keys to biking in a skirt is the “wiggle down” when said skirt or dress is of the pencil variety and goes as such: stand up on peddles and shake butt ever so slightly so skirt wiggles down to once again cover yourself like a lady.
8. Last week also marked year #2 that I’ve been living in the frat house. Boys– we’re so lucky to have found each other. Now please go buy propane for the grill.
9. Other things I forgot about spring time: you have to shave your legs every day and make sure your toenails are painted and be on guard for sunglass tan lines at all times. It’s just so much work.
10. These allergy pills are also giving me cotton mouth, so I’m off to chug water. But before I do– the song of the week. Because I can almost dance like that. And this may not be not safe for work. Especially if your place of employment doesn’t appreciate some good booty bouncing.