1. Full disclosure: I have not posted all week because I’m a lazy bum. Which is also why this is poorly written and edited. Enjoy!
2. I left for Minnesota on Thursday evening to spend the weekend with my grandpa in Duluth. I had just enough time between the end of the work day and take-off to drink slightly more than recommended before a 3 hour flight. Being friends with the bartender is both a blessing and a curse. Because while T-Bone and I only had a $19 bar tab, the 3 glasses of wine were poured heavy and the shot of tequila on the house.
I have very mixed feelings about tequila, but generally subscribe the theory that it should never ever ever be drank, unless you’re super interested in making bad decisions and/or taking off your clothes. Turns out the combination of wine, tequila and french fries just made me pass out. I was asleep from the moment I buckled my seat belt until our wheels touched down in Minnesota– making it effectively the best flight I’ve ever taken.
3. It was touch and go for a minute when I was on the train to DCA, as I was 100% convinced I was going to miss my flight. That would have been a terrible phone call to make to my mother. To be fair, I’m notorious for cutting it really close on my way to the airport but have yet to actually miss a flight. So I’ve got that going for me.
4. Time spent with my grandpa mostly revolves around when he likes to smoke his cigars (for medicinal purposes) and eating. Saturday afternoons include a “cigar run” which is a scenic drive around the city of Duluth, some moderate trespassing on the docks now managed by Homeland Security and the driver inhaling a shit ton of second-hand smoke, as he prefers to drive with the windows up.
5. Post-dinner cigar. I look fabulous. He looks like ET.
6. My mother loves a good deal more than anything else in the world– it doesn’t matter if she already has 3 polar fleece jackets, this Mountain Hardware jacket is 50% off! She likes to stash her finds in the study closet and therefore, is always prepared for birthdays, weddings and all other occasions that involve gift-giving.
As we were going through the jewelry picking out a pair of earrings for her friend’s birthday the night I got into town, she started gifting me things as well– wool socks, a small clutch and a cheese cutting tool set. I stashed it all in my carry-on and didn’t think twice about any of it.
Until 5AM Monday morning. In the airport security line. I had successfully retrieved my shoes, purse and belt from the conveyer belt and was waiting for my suitcase when I saw the cheese cutting knife blown up and looking incredibly menacing on the x-ray machine. That obviously got confiscated.
Further proves my point that I am capable of absolutely nothing before 8AM. What kind of idiot tries to take a knife onto an airplane? Even if it’s specifically designed to cut soft cheese and not people. Quite frankly, I’m pleased I didn’t get arrested.
7. This has been making me smile week. I’ve got it bookmarked for rough days at the office. Or in life.
8. I’ve decided to take a crack at running again. It’s not that I particularly like running– in fact I think it sucks. But as a moderately athletic woman, I find it embarrassing that I can’t run three miles without wanting to keel over and die. Plus I’d like to be able to run away if I was being chased.
I’ve only a gone 1 -2 miles at a time so far, either home from the gym or around the neighborhood, but I’m feeling good. I’ve strategized my routes to end every mile at a Capital Bike Share stand in the off chance I need to bail.
Last night I was running down 2nd Street enjoying the spring weather, the wind blowing in my hair, super super stoked that I was still able to breath as I neared the end of my second mile. As I mentally congratulated myself for being SO AWESOME at running and took a deep breath– I swallowed a bug. Job well done, as per usual.
9. The boss man has been out of town for almost three weeks. Most of our correspondence since he’s left has been to remind me to water his plants. I’ve excelled at killing plants around the office in the two years I’ve been here, so the reminders are necessary. I’ve got post-it notes all over my desk along the lines of WATER THE PLANTS!!! and I’m delighted so say they are all still alive.
10. Roommate B and one of the frat boy friends got into a heated debate with some kids a couple years younger than us about the best rap album ever. They were voting for 50 Cent, but we’re standing by Nelly’s Country Grammar. I used to rock out to this song. You know– in my mother’s minivan. When she was driving. Super bad ass.